When we marry or cohabitate with someone we are creating a new entity from two individuals. Each person is hopefully complementary to the other. When the relationship stops working, the feelings are beyond disappointment and venture into betrayal because of the new entity that was created and now is no longer being sustained. Therefore, we feel hurt and even angry to a depth we never dreamed possible.
A future post will address coping skills.
Please share you reactions and thoughts to this, or any prior post.
Mediation is a process where a neutral third party facilitates participants resolving issues in their conflict or dispute. A professional mediator has specialized training in mediation in addition to being a legal or mental health professional. Mediation saves time, money and emotion. For more information visit http://www.crainemediation.com
At the root of most relationship struggles, if not all, are issues of power and control. Negotiating a healthy balance can be challenging. Here are some ideas to help:
1. Learn to listen, even if you think you already do.
2. Use I messages to express feelings and own your reactions to the other person’s words and/actions.
3. You cannot change the other person, only yourself.
4. Speak and act towards others the way you want then to speak and act towards you.
Just a start. Hope it helps!
When your state does not recognize your relationship as a legal union affording you to rights under the law, consider mediation fora cohabitation or separation agreement, especially when children are involved. Mediation is still a viable option even if your relationship is legally recognized. For more information visit http://www.crainemediation.com
“Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.”